Raptors and Your Pitiful Survival Attempts..

We all know that eventually Raptors will get bored and decide to rise up and take over the rest of the world. Most likely this will happen after Fox cancels one too many a Whedon show or if enough Lindsey Lohan/ Paris Hilton clones propogate and form a critical "Annoying celebrity 'bad girl'" mass.

At that point, raptors of course will consume the flesh of humans everywhere leading to the new Saurian Empire.

There is no hope for human kind.

But you might be able to live a little longer.

Rules of the game:
Posters alternate posting escapes for raptors and then how the raptors will eventually bypass said escape.

ex.
Poster 1: I lock myself in a titanuim box.
Poster 2: You forget airholes and suffocate.
I fly to mars.

The raptors sabotaged your oxygen tank and you asphyxiate to death on the unforgiving red martian soil.

I hijack a nuclear sub to live underwater for the rest of my days.

The scuba raptors find you, get aboard, and eat you.

I edit the Wikipedia page for raptors, turning them into herbivores.
wikipedia never lies.

An admin edit wars with you, then bans you.

I hide on Air Force One.

The raptors hire T-Rexes with F-14s. T\AirForce One is blown out of the sky, and your remains are devoured.

I turn myself into binary code and hide among the billions of pages on the Internet.

Commander Error wrote:

The raptors hire T-Rexes with F-14s. T\AirForce One is blown out of the sky, and your remains are devoured.

I turn myself into binary code and hide among the billions of pages on the Internet.

Raptor hackers delete everything on the internet, a process which will take years, but you are eventually deleted.

You posted no survival plans, and are simply eaten.

I transform into a raptor and join them, eating humans.

I blast you with repulsor rays, the kind found in Iron Man's armor.

I build a real life, working Iron Man armor and start going on a raptor hunt.

The raptors fire EMP bursts at you, crippling your suit. You become canned food.

I ascend and fly into the sun.

I'm the doctor. You cant kill me.

Commander Shane Kobialka wrote:

I'm the doctor. You cant kill me.

The rules of the thread apply, and you are torn apart by the controversy.

I survive in the sun, because no one posted the raptor's response.

No couse you stupidly burn to death. I warp myself in an opposite dimension, making attempts to eat me into attempts to feed me for the rest of my life (for free ! )

The raptors hire what remains of the IDF to coax you out of hiding then devours you and your comrades in a spectacular feast.

I hide on board the ISS with an infinite oxygen supply and an AK-47.

The spaceraptors board the ISS and cut the O2 supply.You suffocate,a nd your remains are devoured.

I hide in a heatproof bubble in the center of the Earth with an infinite supply of, well, supples.

The raptors poison the oxygen. I still hide in the opposite dimension where raptors feed me because IDF will be turned into FDI out there (Federal Dumbness Institute )

Iv121 wrote:

The raptors poison the oxygen. I still hide in the opposite dimension where raptors feed me because IDF will be turned into FDI out there (Federal Dumbness Institute )

The raptors from this dimension send a force through, which eats you.

I hide aboard a giant FTL ship, armed with automated anti-raptor weapons and filled with supplies. Also, with a protected O2 supply.

You eat an infected rat and succumb to the Black Plague.

I offer the raptors steak.

They eat the steak, then you.

I sit in the middle of a field, inside a fusion-powered forcefield, on top of a replicator, laughing.

The replicator returns a #0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 code when you try to use it, and emits a nuclear explosion, incinerating your pitiful human body and a good portion of the surrounding terrain.

Tiel aimlessly stands in front of the approaching wall of raptors. I mutate into a raptor-eater and dive into the approaching paradise.

The raptors you eat have explosives inside.

I detonate the explosives inside the raptors, wiping them out.

While they surround you ... I mutate into a flu that kills the raptors .

An alien race comes and think that the raptors are the dominant species and give the raptors an injection against you.

IMA FIRIN MA LAZORZ AT DA RAPTOARZ.

Julo wrote:

An alien race comes and think that the raptors are the dominant species and give the raptors an injection against you.

IMA FIRIN MA LAZORZ AT DA RAPTOARZ.

raptors are immune to lazors, your are horrendously slaughtered

I transist into a omnicient, etheral state by use of a messed up flux capacitor

I give up. Raptors eat me.